Big Fattie Banana Walnut Muffins

I made these the other day when I was sick and ansy. You may say, who the fuck wants to eat muffins made by a sick person? I don't know, man. That's not my department.



The recipe is from Isa Chandra Moskowitz and Terry Hope Romero's Veganomicon. I used all whole wheat pastry flour - a magical flour that allows you to make what my coworker Miriam disdainfully calls "health muffins" while still keeping them fluffy - and I replaced the wheat germ with milled flax cause it was all I had. And apparently you can do that cause they came out just fine. And obviously, I also put in a whole bunch of walnuts cause walnuts are so excellent.

The most significant feature of these muffins is that they are enormous, easily twice the size of mortal muffins. And that is probably also the best way to decrease their health quotient. Just eat muffins til you pass out. A muffin bender. Who's with me?

Arugula-Walnut Pesto with Peas and Faux Chicken

I just got this adorable baby food processor. I really should've taken a picture of it cause it's so damn cute. But anyway, this gadget was on my mind as I was coming home from work the other night, and I decided I had to make pesto. I didn't feel like spending tons of money on a huge bunch of basil and hunting down pine nuts, but I already had arugula and walnuts at home. I added a some peas for veggie flavor and sauteed Morning Star chik'n strips for protein.



This should make enough for maybe 3 bowls of pasta, or you could also use it as a sandwich spread, mix it into scrambled eggs, etc.

Ingredients

1/4 cup walnuts
Maybe half a bag of arugula
Plenty of olive oil on hand (maybe up to 1/4 cup)
Maybe 1/4 cup fresh grated parmesan cheese*
Salt and (lots of) pepper
Optional: peas and sauteed fake chicken strips, cut into small pieces

*You can leave this out for vegan pesto, but you may want to add something else for flavor. Not sure what; maybe Erica can weigh in on this.)

Directions

Sorry the measurements are so imprecise, but pesto is really all about feel. You'll have to see for yourself what amounts work for you, and taste it frequently. Grind the walnuts for a bit, then start adding arugula. If you're using a little baby processor like me, you'll only be able to add a small amount at a time, which is okay. Pour in some oil when you add the arugula. Process it smooth and add more, adding a little more oil when needed. When you've got the amount you want and the texture and taste are good, add the cheese and some salt and pepper. You may need to add a little more oil.

When it's ready, toss your pasta and optional fixins in. Voila.

Peanut Butter and Jelly Cupcakes

Sometimes, I get these ideas in my head. And I cannot rest until I have executed them. Sometimes these experiments go awry; sometimes, as here, they are delicious beyond any imagining. I found a solid recipe for peanut butter cupcakes (this one is very delicious but not vegan; you can certainly substitute a vegan recipe if you like) and dropped pockets of strawberry preserves right into the batter, instead of filling them more traditionally with a pastry bag. This was easier, more beautiful, and allowed me to put in lots of jelly, which is what I wanted.



Ingredients

1 cup all purpose flour
1 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp salt
6 tbsp (3/4 stick) unsalted butter, softened
3/4 cup smooth peanut butter, room temp
1 cup brown sugar
1 egg
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/2 cup milk (maybe an extra splash if the batter is too goopy)

You'll also, of course, need jelly or fruit preserves, in the flavor of your choice; I was using delicious strawberry preserves from Trader Joe's, but if your preserves are too liquidy, you might want to strain some of the liquid off first.

Directions

Preheat oven to 350F. Get your muffin tin ready with paper liners or set out your silicone cups (which is what I use).

Sift flour, baking powder and salt into a medium bowl and set aside. In a large bowl, beat the butter, peanut butter and brown sugar until smoothly blended and lightened in color, about 1 minute. Scrape down the sides of the bowl as needed during mixing. Mix in egg. Add vanilla and beat for 1 minute or until the batter is smooth.

Add the flour mixture in 3 additions and the milk in 2 additions, beginning and ending with the flour mixture and mixing until the flour is incorporated and the batter looks smooth. I threw in an extra splash of milk here because I thought it looked too thick.

Plop a small drop of batter into each cup, using your spoon to smooth it up the sides of the cup a bit so you create a sort of well for the jelly. (This is something I didn't think to do at the time but should have done. But my cupcakes came out awesome anyway.) Plop in as much jelly as you want (but don't go crazy here) and then cover with batter. You can fill these pretty full; they seem to be able to handle it.

Bake about 20-22 minutes until the tops are just firm and beautifully golden; it will be hard to test them with a fork or toothpick, due to that whole filled-with-jelly thing, but you can try. Mine had cracks on the top, making them look like peanut butter cookies from above, which I liked. Cool them away from your still-warm oven and serve with a frosty glass of soy/rice/almond/cow/goat milk. Or a beer. Be prepared for your facial muscles to stick in an expression like this one when you eat them:



I was originally planning on making a frosting for these, but when I tried them I realized they were perfect and anything more would be too much. However, if you're serving these as a dessert and not just cramming them all into your face at once, I do think a simple scoop of vanilla ice cream (or your favorite vegan sub) would be a wonderful addition.

Here you can see the jelly pockets poking through.



My hand model, Chris Riggs, displays the inner workings of the cupcake. Luckily he works for baked goods.

Poached Eggs with Cilantro Tomato Sauce

I've been on a poached egg kick lately. Something about how fucking difficult they are to get right awakens a sense of adventure in me. And while plain old salt and pepper is hard to beat, sometimes I feel a little creative and want to do something special. I found an intriguing recipe on Epicurious but it was a little too fancy for a Thursday night. But I liked the idea of a substantial tomato sauce flavored with cilantro, so I thought I'd try an easy version. The result is really tasty and satisfying and something I've made a bunch of times since.



Ingredients

2 fresh eggs (best for poaching)
A couple tablespoons of apple cider or rice vinegar
1 small can tomato sauce
3 or 4 garlic cloves, thinly sliced
1/2 bunch of cilantro, finely chopped
salt 'n pepper
an english muffin or something
optional: a little fresh parmesan


Directions

First, take a decent-sized pot and fill it with about 3 inches of water. Decant your eggs, carefully - you're fucked if the yolks break - into two little cups; teacups with adorable little handles are perfect. Turn the heat on your pot of water, and while it heats up, you can start frying your garlic in a little oil. Once it starts getting brown, dump in the tomato sauce and stir it around a bit. Keep the heat low here.

Pour some vinegar into the water; the more you use, the better the egg whites will set. You can use regular white vinegar, too, but my suggestions above are tastier. Once the water boils, turn the heat down so there's little bubbles but the water is still. This is the slightly tricky part; I'm still mastering it. Stir the water to make a whirlpool and carefully dip an egg-cup into it so the egg slides out. If you do this right, the egg will swirl around in the water and the magic of centrifugal force will gather the white around it. Do the same with the second egg, obviously being careful not to mess with the first one. Once they're both in there, stir carefully to make sure they're not sticking to the bottom - that'll ruin em - then turn off the heat and cover the pot. If you like the yolks really runny, which is the only way serious people eat poached eggs, only leave them for about a minute, just until the whites set. You can leave them longer but they'll cook more.

Poaching:



A breached yolk:



Meanwhile stir the cilantro into your tomato sauce and let it wilt there. Scoop your adorable, fluffy eggs onto your freshly-toasted english muffin with a slotted spoon and top generously with the sauce. And actually if you've got some leftover cornmeal pancakes from the delicious chili you made a couple nights ago those would make a delicious bed for the eggs, too. Then shave some parmesan on top, liberally sprinkle with black pepper, and eat them eggs up.



One final note: this makes enough sauce for 4 eggs, so either invite a friend to dinner or save half of it for more eggs later! It'll still be good next time you want fancy eggs (which if you're like me will be in like 6 hours).

Sweet Potato Bisque with Corn and Jalapeno

The root vegetable base and hearty texture of this soup say winter, but the cheerful colors - bright orange, yellow, and green - say summer. And the taste says delicious!



I've copied the recipe here from the New York Times, who adapted it from a new cookbook of classic New Orleans recipes rescued from Katrina. Kind of a neat idea. And while I'm sure plenty of those recipes are loaded with shrimp and heavy cream (you know they've got like 8 ways of serving poached eggs down there?), this is naturally vegan and super easy to make. Well, alright, it's a little more complicated if you don't have an immersion blender - but if you don't then how do you LIVE anyway?? Go out and get one and then make this soup.

Sweet Potato Bisque with Corn and Jalapeno



Ingredients

1 tablespoon peanut or olive oil
1/2 cup chopped onions
2 teaspoons minced garlic
3 medium sweet potatoes (about 2 1/2 pounds total), peeled and cut into 1-inch cubes
4 cups vegetable or chicken stock
1 medium jalapeño, seeded and finely chopped
2 cups fresh or frozen corn kernels (I doubled the recipe from 1 cup, cause I like corn)
2 tablespoons molasses
1/2 tablespoon kosher salt
1/4 teaspoon ground cayenne
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
Scant pinch ground cinnamon
Finely chopped scallions, green parts only.

Directions

1. In a large saucepan or soup pot, heat oil over medium heat. Add onions and garlic and sauté until just soft, 2 to 3 minutes. Add sweet potatoes and stock and bring to a boil.
2. Reduce heat and simmer until potatoes are soft, about 10 minutes. Remove from heat. Using an immersion blender or a food processor, purée contents of pot, in batches if necessary, until smooth.
3. Reheat soup, stirring in jalapeño, corn, molasses, salt, cayenne, black pepper and cinnamon. Taste, adjust seasonings and serve, topped with scallions.

The soup comes out very hearty and filling, despite the few and simple ingredients, and not as spicy as you might think. I served mine with cheesy whole wheat muffins I made for the occasion, though some nice crusty bread from your local bakery would probably be just as excellent. And it did seem to quite well with Sierra Nevada's Pale Ale.

Cheesy whole wheat muffin biscuit guys



I could only buy jalapenos in a package of 8, so I'll definitely be making this again soon... who wants to come over for dinner?

Pancakes: They're Not Just For Breakfast For Dinner Anymore

Seitan and Mole Chili with Savory Cornmeal Pancakes



I've been on a real pancake kick recently, ever since our mom served me pancakes with a runny fried egg on top. It was a delicious revelation, and opened my eyes to the many possibilities of the savory pancake. You can get all fancy and put stuff in your batter, but really, a savory pancake is just any old pancake used in a savory situation (just don't put too much sugar in the batter). So when I was planning to make a big beautiful pot of chili, I decided that rather than corn muffins, I would make some nice, moist, violently yellow cornmeal pancakes as an accompaniment.

The chili recipe is slightly adapted from the immortal Vegan with a Vengeance, by Isa Chandra Moskowitz and Terry Hope Romero. The molasses and cocoa give it a fabulous mole flavor and deep color that I find very compelling. I do canned tomato sauce instead of crushed tomatoes because I'm picky about tomato-eating, but chili is super adaptable, so feel free to change that (and other things) around. The recipe makes a soupy chili, ideal for dippin.'

Chili



Ingredients

1 big onion, chopped
lots of garlic, diced (I like 4 or 5 cloves but it's up to you)
1 package good-quality seitan (Ray's is great in the Philly area), finely chopped
1 red pepper, chopped
1 jalapeno, finely chopped (optional)
1.5 tbs cumin
1 tbs chili powder
2 tsp cinnamon
1 can pinto beans
1 can kidney beans
2 small cans tomato sauce
2 tbs molasses
2 tbs cocoa powder (unsweetened, duh)
lots of black pepper
1 cup good-quality veggie stock

Directions

Saute the onion and pepper in some oil for a few minutes; add the garlic and seitan and saute for another maybe 8 minutes. Add the spices and saute anotehr minute or two, to create a "flavor foundation," as Rich Landau of Horizons Cafe likes to call it. Add the beans, tomato sauce, molasses, cocoa, and stock, and stir it up with some pepper. Bring to a boil, then reduce to a simmer, and cook covered for about 20 minutes, stirring infrequently to keep it from burning if you have a shitty pot like me. After that, turn off the heat and just let it sit for at least 30 minutes. Longer won't hurt it, and you can always reheat, so it's time to make the pancakes.

These pancakes use egg, but there are obviously many wonderful vegan pancake recipes out there. The main thing here is that I add black pepper and use olive oil instead of a more neutral-tasting oil.

Savory Cornmeal Pancakes



Ingredients

2 cups cornmeal
.5 cup all-purpose flour
1 tbs sugar
2 tsp baking powder
.5 tsp baking soda
Generous sprinkling of freshly ground pepper (try adding some pink peppercorns to your black)
2 cups milk or soymilk
.5 cup water
.25 cup olive oil
1 large egg
1 cup corn kernels, optional

Directions

Preheat the oven to like 200 and keep a baking pan in there, so you can keep your pancakes warm as you make them. Mix the dry ingredients together; mix the wet ingredients together (leave the corn be for now if you're using it). Gently mix dry and wet together, moistening all ingredients but being careful not to overmix, which will totally ruin your pancakes. Let it sit for a minute as you heat up your pan, adding some oil - only a wee wee bit if you're using nonstick. Once the pan is nice and hot, I like to use a ladle or a 1/4 cup measurement to dole out the batter. Once it's in the pan, sprinkle corn kernels into it before it sets. As you finish the pancakes, put them on the pan in the oven to keep them warm.

You may want to add a little shredded cheddar, if you're into that kind of thing. Either way, you should dip the pancakes in your chili, get full as fuck, and then watch some cartoons or something. Perfect for a cold winter's night with friends.

Here my friend Molly demonstrates dipping techniques:



I've got a bunch more recipes to warm you up this winter, so stay tuned folks and folkettes.

Giant Monster Cupcake

In case you didn't know, everybody's favorite uzbek-speaking vegan just arrived in Khyrgyzstan yesterday. She'll be there for 7 weeks learning the language, doing field work, and eating her secret stash of Larabars. A few days ago, the other brutal Feldman (that's me) and a bunch of her friends threw Erica a surprise early birthday/going away party.

For me, the major plan for the party - the big surprise - was a gigantic fucking cupcake, or to be more precise, a double bundt cake made in a pan shaped like a gigantic fucking cupcake.

Here's the badass cake pan I used:





I used Isa Chandra Moskowitz's chocolate bundt cake recipe from her Veganomicon book, or rather, I used it twice, for the top and bottom of the cupcake.



I decided to add chunks of peppermint dark chocolate to the batter, and make a peppermint frosting to finish it off. Here's the beautiful chocolate - I used that endangered species brand.



I did have some issues with the baking - I'm not gonna lie. Usually I bake tiny little things that are done in 20 minutes or so. The bottom half of the cake was in the oven for almost 2 hours, in the end, because it just wouldn't bake through. It ended up a little too chewy on the edges but much more edible than I'd feared.



And the top - the creamy cakey part - turned out beautifully. It was still in the oven for about an hour and a half, but I was more careful this time.



The whole assemblage:



Here she is getting frosted with the peppermint frosting... don't you dig the pale green color?



Fully frosted.



And the finishing touch... drippy chocolate ganache! Isa Chandra says that peppermint frosting is nothing without chocolate ganache, so I obeyed. Here you can see that the cupcake is bigger than my and Erica's heads! Photo credit for the next two by Jenni Warner.



Cutting it into slices was a daunting task.



Erica was indeed surprised!



And then, all that remained...



This cake was a huge pain in the ass... but I can't wait to make it again!